When I cannot s…

When I cannot see you

When I cannot see you, I miss your laugh. When I cannot see you, I miss running around with you. When I cannot see you, I miss our over the top crazy times. When I cannot see you, I just plain wish I could see you. Even if you’re old and fat and greying, I’ll recognize you from a mile away. If you’re in a ninja suit, I’ll know you from the way you start walking crazy in my presence. I will hold the one hope in my heart to be with you again.

The days when we were young and saw life for its pretty colors and animal shaped clouds. Sitting in our gardens, looking up at the sky and waiting to grow up. See what happened, we grew up too soon. I wasn’t ready. Now I have to act that way because everyone expects me to. When I cannot see you, I want to see you. Hear you, hug you and laugh with you.

Those amazing birthdays and Christmas days, walking around in fake cotton snow pretending it’s real. Getting all the moms together and poking them for cake but not getting anything apart from the slaps. Those days when we read The Enchanted Woods and 13o’clock tales, and wishing and praying, we were in it and pretending our garden trees were the Faraway Tree.  The times when we picked up random street pups, and ended up getting scabies and didn’t even tell the parents about it.  Those were the times when I wore a pair of heels, that I found somewhere in my house, to the nearest park. And came back without the heels on the shoes. It was the time when one of us was either getting chased by monkeys or falling into gutters.

These beautiful and simple memories are what keep me close to you, the pictures of you I hold close to my heart. You’re closer to me than any man I ever love, will get. I will be around to cup my hands around your face when you’re about to cry and I know you will do the same. My love for you is much more than anything I’ve ever felt. I’m glad we spent all these years together because if it wasn’t for you, I would be living a hollow existence and not knowing the best people I know.

When I cannot see you, I would kill to see you.



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